“The People™ of TPC™ strive to put forth Current Truth™ through parody and satire, but lately parody and satire has been writing itself with a tsunami of actual absurdities.”
Within two hours, this headline was published:
(Lest there be any confusion, my commentary continues below)
Few places in the world can match the Orwellian lunacy of the United Kingdom, which has degraded from the British Empire to the United Kingdom to the Politically Correct Nanny State of National Self-Destructive Leftist-Apologist Population-Replacing Speech Censors and Rape-Gang Protectors.
Nothing done by or in the U.K. surprises us anymore as it doles out absurdity after absurdity almost as rapidly as it doles out concessions to the ever-increasing number of foreign migrants conquering it, but banning cats really takes the cake…at least according to Edinburgh resident Doug MacLaws.
“This really takes the cake,” says Doug MacLaws, a Scottish Fold (which is something English armies often saw on battlefields over the centuries).
Why do some Scots want to ban cats? One might expect a reasonable motive, like fomenting a mass exodus of wine-drinking single feminist women, but no…the ban is intended to save birds and bats from being murdered by roving cats. Can it be that wine-drinking single feminist birdwatchers are behind the ban? Such cattiness among Scottish Karens is unlikely. Environmentallyretardedness is far more likely.
Those supporting the cat ban have yet to prove that cats are more responsible for killing birds than the myriad of ecotarded windmills that deface the Scottish countryside. Neither have they proven that cats are murdering bats, who seldom land on ground and sleep hanging from cave ceilings, attic rafters and other inaccessible places.
Now, I like all manner of domestic pests although I am not currently owned by any cat. Personally, my philosophy is “Feet that have touched the litter box shall never touch mine (floors, or mine kitchen counter, or mine bedding, or mine lap, etc.)," so it’s not as if I hate cats. I don’t. I’m just allergic to them.
Moreover, I don’t think cats are demons sent by Satan. I never fantasize about collecting cats in a sack and chucking it into a river; or dropping a cat into a big, steep pot of boiling water; or tossing a cat on a bonfire; or dabbing a booger on the base of a cats's tail (that really makes them crazy)…no, not me. Those are all things Europeans did in the 14th Century that initiated the proliferation of rodents who bore the fleas that facilitated the spread of the Bubonic Plague that wiped out 25 to 50 million people.
The Black Death was an unintended consequence of making cats scapegoats for human failings. Today, in Scotland, the unintended consequence of making cats scapegoats is already known: its lawmakers can now assuredly be described as dopey wokesters.